How to Get Him to Be Romantic
For several years within my current relationship I felt that something was missing. My man is amazing. I’m so lucky I can say that. He’s kind, loving and faithful. I realize how fortunate I am in that regard, but things had gotten to a point where it felt almost boring. The spark wasn’t only gone it was nowhere in sight. We got along okay. We had fun at times, but I’d witness the interactions between my female friends and their boyfriends or husbands and sometimes I’d feel a stab of envy. One friend in particular seemed to have it made. Her guy was the type that was so romantic. He didn’t need any special occasion to send her a love letter and he would bring her beautiful flowers just because it was a Wednesday or the sun was shining. She felt cherished, and it was then that I realized that I wished my guy was more like hers.
The disheartening reality is that not all men are naturally romantic. Most aren’t. My guy didn’t seem to have a romantic bone in his body. There were times when my birthday would be approaching and he’d ask me, “are we still buying greeting cards for each other?” The day would come and go with nothing more than a quick “Happy Birthday” on his way out the door to work. Valentine’s Day was like any other day. Often he’d even forget to acknowledge the day at all. I loved him, so I overlooked it, but in the back of my mind and heart, there was always a deep sense of disappointment and frustration.
We’re all capable of positive change so I knew that with the right approach and if I gained some insight into the male mind, that I could get him to be more romantic. I didn’t want to necessarily change him. But I did want to feel as though he was putting in some effort to sweep me off my feet. (Secretly, women wish for that – we crave it and we feel so fulfilled when it happens.)
I realized that with the right psychological triggers presented in a very specific way that I could get him to be more romantic. It’s not complicated – it’s all about appealing to him in a way that draws out his natural romantic nature.
My relationship is different now. For my last birthday I received a framed handwritten letter from him listing everything he loved about me.
What WON’T Make Him More Romantic
Let’s face it, as women, we’re not always emotionally equipped to deal with situations in exactly the right way. Hence, the internal debate about getting him to be more romantic. Part of you is certain that there’s value in telling him repeatedly that you wish he was more romantic. Another part of you is searching for subtle ways to convince him to want to be more romantic on his own. Here’s a short list of things you really want to try your best to avoid doing in your quest to turn him into your own personal Prince Charming:
Don’t get angry when he’s not romantic. If you and your man have been together for any length of time you know that he’s not a mind reader. He can’t even anticipate what you’d like for dinner, let alone know when you need or want him to be romantic. If you get angry with him because you expected him to be romantic and he wasn’t, you’ll be setting yourself up for an argument. Without the proper guidance from you, he won’t know what your expectations are.
Don’t nag him into being romantic. Nagging is exhausting, isn’t it? It’s actually much harder on you than it is on your man. Men have an innate ability to tune out a nagging partner over time. It’s actually quite astonishing how they do it. I’d label it a talent. They still respond with the obligatory, “yes, dear” in the right place, they nod in agreement where required, yet they never really hear what we’re nagging about. If you nag in an effort to get him to be more romantic, you’re actually essentially begging him for it. That’s not really what you want, is it?
Don’t compare him to another man who is romantic. Nothing kills a man’s desire to be a better partner than being told he’s “not as good as another man.” It doesn’t matter if your best friend’s boyfriend or husband is the definition of romantic, don’t mention this to your guy. He doesn’t want to know that someone else is doing anything better than he is. This is a direct and critical blow to his male ego and it can damage the connection between you two for a very long time. I realize it’s tempting to take this route but consider how hurtful it will be to your man. It’s not going to spur him into romantic action. It’s just going to sting and cause him to distance himself from you.
There is a very simple way to get any man to be more romantic, loving and devoted to you. You can have the romance you wish for.
Why Some Men Aren’t Romantic
The question of why are some men romantic while others are romantically challenged isn’t a new one. Women have been asking this question forever. At times it can appear as though certain women win the romance lottery. They find a partner who continues to be romantic long after the newness of the connection has worn away. It’s natural to want your man to be romantic. It adds a certain something to your relationship. Understanding why some men seem naturally born romantic while others struggle can help you gain some insight into your own man.
Men define romance in a very different way than we do. It’s much the same with directions. We think they’re essential while men view them as optional. To a man romance is often a means to an end – the end being a committed relationship with you. He may have remembered to bring you flowers, and left small notes for you when you two were first dating because winning your heart was the challenge and he’d do anything to reach that goal. Now he knows he has you so he sees no reason to continue to put forth that much effort.
Many men also just don’t understand the value of simple romantic gestures to the woman they’re involved with. Your guy may not realize how much it means to you when he calls you in the middle of the day to say he adores you or when he picks up your favorite coffee on his way to see you. It’s not that he’s intentionally being unromantic, it’s just that he’s not aware of the significance of being romantic.
Any man can be transformed into a romance addict. You can make your man crave romance in your relationship just as much as you do.
Turn Him Into a Hopeless Romantic at the Push of a Button
February 14, 2011 was a day that changed my life.
I was watching Rachael Ray’s talk show. (Her recipes are one of my guilty pleasures.) The show was based around love and since it was Valentine’s Day and I knew my man was more than likely going to pretend it was just another day, I was feeling a bit blue.
On the television popped a man named Michael Fiore. He was talking about romance and why some men just aren’t as romantic as we (women) wish they were. He had developed this revolutionary program called Text the Romance Back. It was all about how any woman could use simple and very straightforward text messages to ignite the romantic part of her partner.
Naturally I was sceptical, but there was a couple in the audience who changed my mind. The woman had used Michael’s techniques and it had changed the dynamic of her relationship with her husband. I was excited. I immediately got online to see what else I could learn about what Michael was suggesting.
He explained on Rachael’s show and also in this video how men want to be romantic. They just really need us to guide them in the right way.
Text messages work so well because they are a way of communicating with your guy without being overly aggressive.
Your man isn’t going to wake up one day and suddenly be romantic. He’s not going to decide on his own that he wants to show and tell you how much he deeply cherishes and adores you. But you can subtly get him to do that and more all by using your cell phone in a very discreet and fun way.
Here’s a link to a video that explains more about how this technique can change your relationship and give you the romance you want and deserve.